Wednesday, June 13, 2012
{ 10:14 AM }
Why are young people so childish? I finally feel that 3 years is a big gap, really. Not physically but mentally. Am I like this when I was 19? I dont know. But I do know that we should not be wasting people's money on personal indulgence.
Why do people buy macbook (pro)? If its for work/school, yes, understood. Because its a trend? No way! do you spend that extra of 500bucks to buy the brand? Thats ridiculous.
Sometimes its really contradicting to be the odd-one-out in a community. You somehow blended within it but at the same time you are rejecting some parts of it. Well, I know Im not making any sense but I really got quite uncomfortable about this our-way-of-thinking-are-different thing.
Maybe its about the macbook thing that im upset about. whenever i see my macbook with all the design tools, I really wish to go back to the life where I can pursue what I like to do. There are a lot of hiccups here and there when doing designing work and you are seriously being under paid compare to the amount of time and effort you put in. But those "no-life" days were truly the days where I felt really alive.
The deadline is drawing close. And I have made my decision to reject the offer from SIT. Jeez... feel like crying my heart out...
Wednesday, May 30, 2012
{ 6:55 PM }
Peaceful day, stressful workload. We sometimes come to a conclusion whereby we all thought the same: what exactly are we doing?
Because we are all first years? I don't know. I thought that since Im (one of) the oldest living student here, I should be clear on my direction. Apparently not.
When things do not advance to the direction where you planned, it goes haywire. Im talking about this guy who is currently studying with me here. Singaporean. Smart guy. Good in managing his own time. prideful. Planned his academic life very well...till something unexpected happened; love life. Never expect himself to fall for somebody here and his life is in a mess now.
Well, mine too, messed up. Honestly speaking, deep down, I actually planned to come back for SIT and give up studying here. After all design is still my interest. I do like journalism too though. But its a new field to pursue. Since I already started off with design, I might as well continue the path.
Life is unexpected, seriously. I came to realise that my real dilemma is about choosing what I like to do and choosing what Im enjoying now.
I start to want to see him everyday. Perhaps this is my very first time talking about subjects like this. Life is really unexpected. I swore that I will never go for anyone younger than me and there I am now, feeling something for this 3 years younger big baby. I just hope that this feeling can get away as soon as possible. I need to concentrate on my work.
Friday, May 25, 2012
{ 7:59 PM }
Wonder why the hell some people can cry out loud so easily but some people can't?
Okay, here's something that I strongly need to emphasize. Im not being negative now. Its just that sometimes when you are facing loss, pressure or whatever reasons that make you wanna cry, some people can just do it easily.
As for me, it has been a long long long long long time since I last flood myself with tears. Freshman year back in Poly I guess? Oh wait, isn't that a little too long? 5 years?! I haven't been crying for 5 years?!
Here's a research showing that crying is actually good for health- mentally.
Researchers have proven what many caregivers have already figured out on their own: sometimes there’s nothing like a good cry to make you feel better. Crying is cathartic.
Neuroscientist and tear researcher Dr. William H. Frey II, PhD, director of the Alzheimer’s Disease Research Center at Regions Hospital in St. Paul, Minnesota, studies the affects of crying. He’s spent over 15 years studying crying and tears.
Research shows:
- 85 percent of women and 73 percent of men felt less sad and angry after crying
- On average, women cry 47 times a year, men cry 7 times a year
- Crying bouts last 6 minutes on average
- Tears are more often shed between 7 and 10 p.m.
According to Frey, “crying is not only a human response to sorrow and frustration, it’s a healthy one. Crying is a natural way to reduce emotional stress that, left unchecked, has negative physical affects on the body, including increasing the risk of cardiovascular disease and other stress-related disorders.
Read more: http://www.care2.com/greenliving/5-reasons-why-crying-good-for-you.html#ixzz1vshqjVHP
On average women cry 47 times a year? wow~ imagine I should be crying err.... 47 X 5 = 235times?!
The hardest thing I can ever deal with in my life, which I realised, is loneliness. if I feel really really lonely one day, I might flood the whole room.
Thursday, May 24, 2012
{ 4:54 AM }
Pizza last night!!! Jesus.... Thats so sinful. Well, for the sake of this guy (his name is Lee Seok Jae by the way) who somehow managed to squeeze himself in the picture, we had to.
Why? Hes sick and pizza is his source of revival. Oddball. Hes one of the few young lad that im really worry about right now. Somehow, work life and poly life served as a good training. I guess im the only few who thinks that the given workloads are...err...no kick?
Remember the motto during poly? If you'd been to hell, anywhere is heaven.
Monday, May 21, 2012
{ 6:33 PM }
Ahhhhhhhhhh........Im in the biggest dilemma in my life~~~!!!!!!!
REALLY REALLY hate the To-Be-Or-Not-To-Be question. Whether or not you are going to make the so-called right decision, you are going to regret it for life.
There are only 3 kinds of jobs that Im interested in: Boss, Designer and Writer (journalist should be the right word). Leaving the first kind aside (well, that is when Im rich enough), let's go into the latter two.
Now, you see the picture? The dilemma between choosing the 2 paths; Designer or Journalist. The feeling is like, you know, very much similar to choosing husbands? If you choose the wrong one, thats the end of your life.
I love experiencing different stuff everyday in Japan. But I hate doing academic works. Rigid and boring.
I love to be in a world full of potential. But I hate doing it in Singapore. Boring and boring.
someone asked, "why these two?"
Because both make you see the world.
Sunday, May 20, 2012
{ 9:59 PM }
Stress, definitely.
Homework, like it or not, just do it.
Homesick, inevitable.
Lonely, open up to others.
Conflicts, unavoidable.
Really worried about some mates who are suffering from all these now. What can I do? I've been through all these but I'm still suffering from it myself. Maybe its hard to communicate because we are from different backgrounds. But "hard" doesnt mean "cant". We dont live in a parallel world.
Well, you guys can't see this but Im still writing it. You guys deserve better. So stop suppressing stuff and open up to us.
Fun, its a must.
True friends, they will always be there.
Monday, May 14, 2012
{ 8:57 PM }
I'm in the 2nd month of my Jap-uni life. Nothing too special, but everyday is different.
Internet-less life for the past 6 weeks. Good and bad. Leave the bad aside, lets talk about the good.
7 freshmen moved into the same apartment on the same (almost) day. 4 Koreans, 2 Singaporeans and 1 Turkmen.
Life is a void when you are cut from the outside world. Everyone felt the same. Therefore, to fill the void, we got together. Thats how the bond started.
We see each other every single day, sunday to saturday, more than 16 hours a day. Imagine, you dont even see your best friends and family that much. The few of us who barely know each other, like it or not, had to.
As we got closer, we started having dinner together, watch movies together, drink shit stuff together and sometimes, even sleep together. The days were fun and the bond was strong.
But it wasnt as strong as I thought. When the internet came, we stopped getting involved into each other's life and start leading our own. Other than school work, we hardly talk about other stuff. Maybe its just me, or what? I don't know.
Well, I admit that I feel lonely easily. There are stuff where no matter how much you tried to cry out to your kins across the other side of the world, it cant actually fill the loneliness you are feeling.
Maybe I fabricated life here to be too perfect. When it comes to fun, we can share it unconditionally. But when it comes to workload and burden, I wonder if we are able to shoulder it altogether unconditionally too.
